what's been going on and Laila's FIRST birthday party!

I've been MIA for some time now and I figured it's time I share what's been going on. Err, that just sounded like I was giving bad news. Hmm, nope no bad news here...except that I just got over the flu and it came out of nowhere! All the sudden I woke up at 2:38 a.m. went to the bathroom and puked, went back to bed, woke up in the morning and sat, and sat oh and sat SOME MORE on the toilet (tmi?) and then went to work. Puked at work, looked like death, was sent home after being there an hour, puked and sat more more on the toilet. Ugh, my body was weak. I could barely walk, pick things up, I was not functioning. Oh and blood showed up. And a fever. Some shivering. Some sweats. Horrible horrible horrible!

Anywho, Laila had her one year appointment December 2 - the day before her birthday party! She's 20 pounds, um can't remember her height and apparently here head shrunk? It'll get remeasured at her next appointment, she just was not too interested in having something wrapped around her noggin' and I don't blame her! Which resulted in a screaming, wiggling back and forth baby while I frankly try and hold tight to make sure she doesn't fall out of my arms. Are one year olds really that strong?!

Shots - oh the dreadful shots. I for sure thought I was going to start crying. This was the worst ever, she's learned that when there are two nurses getting stuff ready that it's time for shots. It was horrible. 2 shots in on her right leg went quickly but the 1 shot on her left leg didn't go so well, she couldn't keep Laila's leg held down too well to get the shot and ended up pricking her and having to redo it. Of course it was a shot that had to sting and she shrieked. eeekkkk. It was horrible. I swooped her up as sooooonnnn as I could. :[ The whole thing just felt so unfair for Laila :[

The next day came so fast and I was rushing to get things done. Good thing Laila napped and hour and a half before her party started. I had to wake her up when all the people started showing up! Everything was a blast and I took in every moment I could, trying not to stress over the little things. Here are some photos from the party.

This is on November 30th - the day she turned 1. Justin put some ice cream on her plate with her cupcake. Too cold ice cream resulted in this face but isn't it still the best face ever!??!! I giggle every time I see this :]

December 3rd - opening birthday presents in front of our Christmas Tree (which she won't stop touching now) 

Pointing at her cake but being such a good girl waiting patiently.

Smearing it all over her face, which took her a while to do. She was gently touching her cake when we first brought it out to her. 

"What is this stuff all over my hands?"

The birthday girl had a blast and actually had to go down for a nap maybe 15 minutes after her cake and people were still gettin' their party on, haha. She received a boat load of toys and they're currently overtaking our formal dining room which has been her playroom ever since we moved in.. I still can't believe I have a one year old. How is that? Can someone turn back time so I can re-live all those precious newborn moments? Nope? I didn't think so. But, I sure will enjoy all these precious moments of my one year old. Love you my dear Laila.

xoxo

cool fact: Laila's name means "dark haired beauty" which I find beautiful. Here's to hoping she has dark hair like myself (she already has my curly hair...on the back of her head)

I'll be leaving but coming back..

 My heart is breaking at this very moment...

On Friday, I leave my daughter for the very first time and I'm having a hard time dealing with the fact that I won't be seeing her till Sunday and who knows what time. I won't be the one bathing her, putting her in her snuggly pajamas and reading her a bedtime story. I won't be able to give her a kiss and a hug, say sweet dreams and kiss her some more. I won't be able to listen to the sound of her fan and breathing over the monitor, the wonderful sound that I fall asleep to every night. I won't be able to sneak in her room and check on her in the middle of the night after a bathroom break. I won't be the one getting up with her, watch cartoons, eat breakfast and play. I won't be able to be with my baby till Sunday and I'm struggling with this.

Maybe I should get to the point of WHY I won't be seeing her. I'm going to Ohio to visit my sister, Leah. I'm stoked to see her since I don't see her that often but at the same time, my heart breaks because I've never been away from Laila...especially overnight.

Justin and I debated back and fourth on me taking her along but the end result was a no :[ I'm terrified to have her fly on a plane..I have this mindset that something is going to go wrong...I feel more comfortable with her staying home with her daddy. Plus, he really wants alone time with her.

I don't know how I'm going to make it...I'm going to cry while I wave bye bye to her :[ It's natural for me. Have I mentioned I cry, like a lot?? Especially lately...

I'm teaching Justin how to Skype before I leave, that's a must because I will NEED to see her somehow and what better way than Skype?! I wish leaving for a couple days would be easier but I just have to remember that I will be back and I'll get to see her smile and laugh all over again.

And of course, what's a post without a picture? Here she is. ALMOST one :]

Pumpkin Patch

Last week (or 2 weeks ago) Justin, Laila and I visited a local Pumpkin Patch. We went just to grab some pictures and watch Laila have a good time. We didn't need to buy any pumpkins this year because my parents grew there own and were kind enough to hand over three to us. So nice of them. Enjoy the over load of pictures :]

This day was overall AWESOME and Laila had a blast, which was the point of going. We did buy her a minature pumpkin, which she just wanted to eat. Sooo..it's now being used for decoration. Haha. I can't wait to go there during winter and see the Christmas trees. I'm not into the real ones because the tend to give me hives. But it'll be awesome to see this place all decorated with Christmas decor. Ah, I cannot wait.

funk

I don't know what's going on with me...I just can't get out of this bloggers funk that I've been in for a month or more.

I just don't want to blog...I'd rather be doing something outside or with my daughter and then when she is off to bed, I have other things to do. Dishes, laundry, packing for the next day. Ya know...household chores.

And I'm stressed. Beyond stessed.

And there have been a lot of bigger changes in our lives. I turned 21 on August 8th, Justin and I got engaged *big smile* and we are in the process of becoming homeowners. Wish us luck!

And then there is Laila, who is the most amazing baby ever but times have been tough with her. She has 5 teeth (2 on bottom 3 on top) All her top ones came in almost at the same time. So I'm dealing with a very cranky, teething baby. And I feel SO bad for not being able to take the pain away. Nothing seems to help...at least not for that long. And all the sudden she doesn't want to sleep anywhere but in bed with us or in her swing. I can't even set her in her pack n play without her waking up and screaming her head off.

It's rough and somedays I just want to pull my hair out.

Anyways, what's a post without pictures?

And since I take more photos from my phone...here are some of those.
*taking a nap at starbucks...how she sleeps thru the noise, I have no clue.
*reading her favorite Dr. Seuss book "There's a Wocket in my Pocket"
*playing with her ears during meal time
*standing while barely holding onto anything

P.S. this little girl weighs 17 pounds

my daughter

Hi! It's been a while since I've taken a nice picture of my daughter and I feel totally guilty about that.

I am know photography but having these photos just reminds me of a great time we had!! 

Here she is. 

My beautiful 8 month old.

our weekend

This weekend was definitely one of my favorites in a while. There was a ton of family time, movie time and then a whole lot of baby time. Of course. There was even a lot of fussiness mixed in with the giggles and cookouts but that didn't stop us from enjoying every second of it...even if we did have a screaming baby.

Laila went swimming in a big pool for the first time. Poor girl wasn't to sure about this big scary and semi cold place so she would try to crawl up her daddy.

She eventually warmed up when the kids gave her some toys to play with and as long as she was moving, she was content.

It was a great time and after swimming we cooled down with some delicious gold fish...she loves those things.

baby feet are just adorable!

I love weekends like these. They remind me what's important and family gatherings give me a great excuse to pig out. Lets just say I ate too much ice cream cake and chocolate eclair cake. But since then I've been working my butt off with P90X and Jillian Michaels.

sleep situation/issues

I'm beat, tired, exhausted, zombified...is that a word? It is, and yes, I looked it up. I want to take a nap, a very nice long uninterruped nap. I feel guilty for saying that but it's true. I miss sleep every.single.day but I would give it up over and over and over again just so I could spend time with my daughter.

Whine. But last night was rough. Wait, beyond rough. Back to the beginning. I'm tired, someone slap me in the face. Or get me some coffee...or both.

Laila went to sleep around 7:30, woke up around 8:30, had a 3 ounce bottle and zoinked back to sleep. I can't remember what time it was but she woke back up. I figured she wanted more to eat, so I fed her. She ate 3 ounces and went back to sleep. I put her in her pack n play and she tossed and turned for quite some time.

She had a hard time falling asleep, staying asleep and getting comfortable. Maybe I can blame it on her horrible cold or maybe she's teething. She didn't want much. I got her to sleep but around 3 she woke up again and stayed up til 4:30. I rocked her and even tried moving her to sleep in her crib, thinking her pack n play just wasn't cutting it anymore. She actually did pretty well in there. Fell asleep around 4:30 but then woke up with me at 5:15.

Maybe that doesn't sound too bad and really it isn't but I'm just tired. Nights like that really get to me because I have to get up at the butt crack of dawn to get ready for work. Plus, I really just didn't know what was going on with my baby. I felt horrible.

I think tonight we are going to try and put her to sleep in her crib instead of in her pack n play. Maybe she will sleep better in her own room. And in all honesty, I really don't want her in her own room yet. I'll miss hearing her breath and move around, the sound of her little whimpers. I won't be able to just sit up and look over at her. I have a feeling it won't last, though. I'll need her next to me and Justin knows it too. He even told me HE wasn't ready to have Laila in her own room, that he enjoys waking up to her right there. Le sigh.

The whole situation just puts me in tears. But seeing this face everyday, snaps me back to my happy self.

six month check up

Friday was Laila's 6 month check up and that meant it was time for her to not only get her measurements but my sweet sweet baby had to get another round of shots. :[ 

sitting in the clinic just waiting for our name to be called.

 ah. finally. Laila seemed to really enjoy hanging out on the table.

 & the whole time she wanted to stand on her two feet. I think she loved the crinkling. 

but, give a girl a lens cap and she's distracted for a good 10 minutes...sometimes.

this picture just cracks me up. she dropped the lens cap and do you see the strand from her mouth to the lens cap. ya that's drool.

& now for her measurements. Laila is 15.1 pounds and and 25 inches long. Her head circumference is 40.5. Our doctor did mention she is only in the 25th percentile which is OK because she is healthy. And I was kind of surprised that she didn't weigh more because I swear that girl just wants to eat and eat, all day long. I have a feeling she is going to be short but skinny like her father.

I'm just glad the shots are over with, until month 9. But this time she really did do amazing. She cried for about 5 seconds and immediately stopped.

Poor girl is currently being rocked in her rocker battling a cold :[ Poor thing.

our week/weekend.

our week/weekend was amazing. the weather cooperated and our house was banging with heat. did I mention we do not have central air? that's right, no air for us, just a window unit and some a million fans. Most of the time, we only turned the window unit on when we went to bed {it's in our room} we like to be nice and chilly while we sleep. but that was for two nights and the rest of those nights, we got lucky and the degrees dropped to the 50's.

getting ready to eat some delicious apples/mango/and something else.

we got Laila a new sippy cup, thanks to this lovely lady who recommended it. Laila sure loves it and does amazing with it. what a big girl.

 Her crib skirt has arrived and I am completely in love with it. I can't thank babydarling enough for it, she sure did an amazing job! It looks perfect with her blue sheet. Next is the curtains in the same pattern! And for the first time ever, Laila played and napped in her crib.

Laila took some much needed naps on daddy and I and we enjoyed every second of it. I may have even fallen asleep as well.



lets hope this week/weekend is just as amazing. except, it's thundering out right now. wisconsin weather is bipolar.

{photo dump}

This week was amazing. We even had some decent days of weather and took full advantage and went for a walk. I can't wait for more days like this. Lets just hope they weather gets out of its weird funk! Hope everyone has an amazing weekend!!!

there's a bumble bee in there, do you see it?